We, the society, have always been harsh and cruel to women who dare to complain about the violence faced by them and worse if they dare complain about sexual harassment. This is the main reason why most victims don't speak up in the first place. If a victim musters the courage to speak up, then we, the society, make their life hell by questioning their character and integrity.
Once in a while, we, the society, take up cudgels against the perpetrators of sexual violence and lending support to the victim/survivor. However, in our effort to ensure justice to the victim, we end up doing injustice to them. The focus is always on seeking punishment for the perpetrators but seldom do we focus on the well being of the victim/survivor. We don't think about the social stigma and the embarrassment that she and her family will face from this very same society. When we lend our support to her cause, we end up feeling good about it for a lifetime, but what about the victim? She has our support only till the time when either the perpetrators have been punished by Law or till she makes headlines in newspapers or media. After that we forget about her.
Will we forget about this young Dalit woman from Patan just like many others? Can we ensure that she can gradually overcome the scars, trauma and the pain of the sexual violence with our sensitive support and care? Can we support her so that she can continue her education and take up a job to support her family and herself?
Yes, we, the young men and women of Ahmedabad lend our full support to this young woman from Patan who has shown tremendous courage by speaking up and bringing this horrendous crime to light. We join her in her struggle for justice. Let us not forget that this can happen to anyone! It is NOT her fault!
We dedicate this Blog to the courageous young woman from Patan. Let us forget about the larger society and instead let each one of us speak for ourselves. You can write your messages of support and solidarity to her and we promise to forward it to her.
40 comments:
Great
Its rare that we see such courage and She has made all of us proud. I pray for her peace and and as one of the proud members of woman community i lend my complete support. My warmest regards to her.
Aruna Pandey
Trust me ..it is very difficult as a woman to acknowledge things like that. Already women in general have a inferiority complex and to realise that you have been taken advantage of and humiliated is intolerant. i appreciate her sanity to be able to take such a step.
I am really very proud to be a woman and I really appreciate the step taken by her friends. I pray for her well being and hope that she stands upto a lot of courage and warm regards to her.
It is indeed great that she has spoken, I only wish that she had done so earlier. The dear girl might have been saved of so much of torture. If there is any way in which I can be of help financially or otherwise for her further education, please contact me at - koumudi@gmail.com
i hope the world sees.. and learns something out of this example! kudos to the brave lady who stood against all odds and now is willing to go back and complete her education despite of what it got her so far..
let's all rise above these insanities and respect each other as individuals regardless of one's caste, creed or GENDER!
That’s very good that girl took a step and made case on those offenders. Society should support her for moral support and for education support. Remember this if anybody may face the same problem like this than please don't seat QUIET.
WAKE UP FRIENDS
DON’T BE AFRAID.WE ALL ARE HERE TO SUPPORT EACH OTHER.
...It is really great to see someone gathering so much courage and fighting back..in a society where we women are still thought to be the weaker sex!!..inspite of so many fearless women around its high time..we fight against this cause and make sure the offenders get the highest punishment that could be given to them...i salute the spirit of this brave woman and support her with ALL MY HEART...
Courage
Courage is to take a step forward into an area of difficulty without a solution in mind, but yet feeling that victory is ahead. It is going empty handed, but knowing that God's hand is stretched out to pull you.
I am thankful for the Brave Patan Girl for standing up for all the women who suffered till now.
First of all i would like to thank Nazariya for the initiative.
As far as society is concerned we should try to view things differently. Rape victim is a victim and she needs to be supported,cared and assisted to get back to normal life. Its not easy for her but re inforcing belief that u r supported,accepted and it was no fault of urs wuld help her get back to life.
Rape is a very terrible,mentally disturbing event. Its as good as murder of self respect. Its sad instead of supporting victim ,knowingly/unknowingly we view victim as if she committed some sin.
May god bless the innocent girl and we as society need to work in two dimensions ,one being as suuportive for the girl to lead a normal life and other being punisher to the crime done.
Thanks a lot for the blog. I too support this initiative and have written on my rediff blog too. And it generated good response. Please keep highlighting such crimes, it is a shame for we - the males. And we shall have to pay for what we do. Let us have no violence against women.
its a real shame that such things happen in our society.. kudos to the girl for showing such courage..and hope theres justice brought on...thanks to nazariya for this inititative
People are saying we are proud of what she did. She showed courage to speak, fighting back and all. But what field work we are doing? What are we doing, do you think just by creating blog or by writing comments we are helping her?
What field work we are doing?
I don't think so.
Waiting for answer here only
by,
Human Being
anonymous is right.we r not doing any field work.
government has announced 1 lakh Rs for her.
but wht i think rite now what see needs is moral support far more than anything.
please come up with suggestions of what we can do for that.
i mean blog is excellent initiative and great step but how do person for whom all these support is coming comes to know that she is being cared??
plz suggest.
It will not be possible for her to trust any person so easy, after such incident.
But I am still wondering why everyone is still taking about that one girl!
It's thanks to her that she took initiative and filed FIR and set example for others.
But we all know how our politics and police works (no doubt there few good persons).
So now, we need to come forward and help police and government to find out such more cams and rackets. We all know by here or there…what’s going on in the society.
But no one is interested to take out time from their personal life and help police and government.
by,
Human Being
its a shameful act and the accused shud b punished strictly!
with ALL the support recievd by the SURVIVOR from various ppl,its nice to know shes ready to fight for justice as a WOMAN. shes shunned the distinctions made on the basis of caste,n has truly set an example for others to follow!
im sure justice will b done.
I really appreciate her courage. We are all here for any kind of support she would need. And hope this gives courage to other girls to stand up and fight against thins kind of inhumanity in future.
Gaurang, your support is commendable.
Thanks!
Dear all,
Let us respect the tremendous courage shown by this victim of rape, and resolve to support all such victims of sexual and domestic violence. As a society we need to take stock of our values; let us counter every such instance of violence, right from our homes to the streets. We need to counter patriarchy politically. Let us not compromise, let us take the struggle of this victim forward...
Prasad
Good initiatives - Nazariya & Patan Girl.
'Social Change' is depends on 'Self Change'. So, not need to change Society, Change Self. SPEAK OUT.
-Dhiren
I know it is going to be very difficult to fight against all these odds. You have to belive in your self and keep fighting for you justice. God bless you.
Mahesh
Ahmedabad
I salute your courage. You have become an idol for other woman. Just because of your courage, many girls have come out and spoke about the justice. Gool luck.
Vaidehi
My thoughts are with those women who suffer from injustice and violence in male-dominant societies. I am a writer from London and I constantly write on such issues. I lived in India previously, visited Patan once and met many women who suffer but remain silent. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
The most difficult question is "when will we help women/girls feel strong enough to fight for her rights?"
How we should help them to fight against/stand up against such adversities?
Just imagine, what Patan girl must have gone through? The pain, suffering... Moreover, after the incident got reported, we come across many similar incidents in various educational institutions.
We should take bold institutions and major revamping of our nation so woman in any part of India- rural/urban feels strong enough to report such incidents. Moreover, the culprits should be given the worst punishment so that it sets an example.
We hope that this incident will awaken leaders in all of us to bring about the CHANGE..
Lots of strength to you....you have taken great courage and we know that moving ahead may have its ups and downs, but we also know that you are strong and determined to get justice for you and for the many others who don't speak up. We are all with you!
May god give you strength to fight for your justice. We are with you.
Sumit Shah
Hope that justice is given to the victim at the earliest and the persons responsible are put behind bars.
Ashit
...lets react as "complaint" and lets get "human"...
- sameer mahoolkar
we need more such women to end the violance against them. Hats of to patan girl...
Shamita
A blog on the internet, newspaper articles... deabtes... i know you did not do what u so fearlessly did for any of these, but in our own citybred, blind and ignorant way...we are with you sister. May god give all of us the courage that u have shown.
Duniya mein sirf anyay he nahin hai, kahin naya toh zaroor hai. Us he naya ki khoj mein, intezaar mein...
Amen.
Kai pan daban ne vash thaya vagar,duniya ni parva karya vagar biji chhokario ni parva karine and bija koi sathe aavu na bane e mate aa ladai chalu rakhjo. Aame tamari sathe chhe.
Paresh Parmar
pareshparmar79@gmail.com
hi,
Get Up Stand Up, Stand up for your right;
Get Up Stand Up, Don’t give up the fight!
We cannot undo the injustice done to you. We can just try to understand the trauma you are going through.
Often, our society portrays the victims as criminals, especially when they are women. We need to change that psyche of our society, by showing respect towards victims.
Please, be my friend! By asking for your friendship, I want to spread this message to the society that you haven’t done anything wrong and I am sorry for what you have suffered so far at the hand of society.
With tremendous respect for you,
sharvari
Violence is about power and control. Rape is not about sex, and enjoying your body--it’s about power. Pornography is about controlling females. Domestic violence is about power, too: whether it leaves a mark on your body or not, it’s more than that mark that hurts you.
There must be more use of positive reinforcement like praise and thanks. The system should educate parents or anyone who is violent against girls to stop the violence. The system doesn’t protect guls from people who harm girls; for example, there should be better screening of people who work in schools and with children. Violence against girls isn’t taken seriously even though it’s hurtful, degrading and harmful to them. When we see a girl who’s badly neglected, for example, it makes us very sad and angry that she isn’t protected. Some girls are scared to do anything about the situation they are in, even to talk to teachers in school!!! A tradition like Female Genital Mutilation, that some people practice in this country, is violence against girls. It’s not acceptable, and we can make laws against it. Girls should not be scared and in pain.
Girls should be in safe and supportive environments. They need to be respected as human beings.
Girls Have The Right To
(1) voice an opinion without being laughed at
(2) enjoy a safe environment
(3) demand respect
(4)be portrayed fairly and accurately
(5) be free
(6) tell about abuse/ tell secrets that hurt them
(7) wear miniskirts without being judged for it
(8) speak out
(9) make sexual harassment of girls more public like the armed forces scandal
(10) change old rules and customs
(11) stop sexual abuse, including incest and Female Genital Mutilation
(12) be happy
(13) be successful
(14) have fun
(15) enforce Title IX
(16) be beautiful
(17) defend these rights
(18) make these rights public
(19) think
(20) live
(21) love
this is such a horrifying act, and we must ensure this young woman knows that there are many people with her, and inspired by her courage. we must ensure we don't let the protest just die down after a few days.
A woman can, and indeed should, be armed with courage, determination, spirit, and knowledge, whether or not she is armed with anything else... and the Patan rape victim has done just that! I commend her for her brilliant spirit! I am sure her act gives has given voice to many silent & supressed victims all across the world!
This episode has shown not only the inner strenght of the girl but also how sick can our country's "elected" leaders can be. Whether it be in the case of Nithari killings or this one or thousands happened before this, i could repeatedly see two revelations coming out : one, the courage of the victims/ their families who KNOW that nothing is going to come out of their complaints very soon. they will have to fight it out for an eternity...cross hurdles of political and judicial systems. And two, we need to rise above the castes, creeds, languages, states, and all sorts of physical barriers.
Even in this patan case, its being pointed out that shes a dalit girl. agreed she is but isnt she a human being first?
Sigh...maybe we can never be JUST human beings...
i give my complete support to the brave girl..indeed, it is true that as a society we tend to hve a very short memory but through intelligent and well-meaning teams like nazariya we hope to remedy this problem.
it would be great if we could keep this going and get more suggestions of how one could help in the long term.
thank u very much for your efforts for people like me.
ME AND MY FAMILY ARE WITH YOU DEAR.
AND FROM HEART ALL THE BEST FOR JUSTICE. YOU HAD SAVED SO MANY OTHER GIRL'S FUTURE. HATS OF TO YOU ...
WE ALL ARE WITH YOU FOR ALWAYS...
AND WE WIL PRAY TO GOD, SURE HE WILL LOOK AFTER YOU...
WITH A LOT OF RESPECT FOR YOU
KAUSHAL & FAMIL
I am very proud of the woman who told authorities what those teachers did--and made sure they did something about it. Thank you, ma'am, for bringing more justice into everyone's world. And I am so happy for you that justice is coming into your world. Please let these bloggers know to let those of us who have commented here if there is anything we should do for you or people who are trying to help you over these next few years. (They can reach me by commenting on my blog or by forwarding a call for action to BrownFemiPower--I read her blog.) You are amazing. -Katie, a woman from the United States
P.S. One more comment. You are innocent. With all my prayers--Katie in the USA.
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